يوم ككل الأيام

من زمان ما شحبرت عن معابري .. هيك وخبصت ..

اليوم حسيت أنه منيح من أوله
ما بعرف ليش ..
بعض من الناس اللي حكوا معي رح يعرفو عن قصة حاستي السادسة الخارقه


المهم ..
في المدرسة ترتيب قاعات .. وامتحان أول
لحسن الحظ أو لسوءه .. كان امتحاني .. ولمادة مش تخصصي
علوم أرض

كنت براقب على قاعة بنفس الوقت
بس تقريبا .. كنت براقب على 6 قاعات بنفس الوقت .. زي القرد .. من قاعة لقاعة
وتخيلوا اني مسكت اثنين بغشو بقاعة مش قاعتي

المهم عدا اليوم على خير ..
بعد ما خلص الامتحان وكونه مديرنا المقلعط بحبسنا على الفاضي كمان كم ساعه
وكونه جو المدرسة ما بنفع فيه اشي الا طق الحنك اللي ما إلي عليه ولا بشلن
قعدت أحضر بفلم أسمه
Prom Wors
ماشي حالة ماشبو شي


من المدرسة .. طلعت على الجامعه
اكلت .. وفتحت مركز الايكو الاقرع للاستشارات العاطفيه وخدمة المجتمع
الشباب الحبيبة
واحد فايت وواحد طالع .. لو بهموا .. طان عرفوا أنو أنا أفشل واحد عاطفياً ..
على اعتبار تاريخي العاطفي الحريقه ..
بس الناس بحبوا اللي بتفلسف وبنظّــر .. واني مالني .. انتو احرار

قعدت شوي عالنت .. ما بين محجوب .. ونزلت كم فلم ..

ساعدت صاحبي .. بشغله
والغمه اللي كانت على قلبي ..
شريك المختبر اللي أكبر مني
خلص شغله اليوم .. وروووووووووووووح
يالله شو ارتحت

رتبت أوراق الامتحان .. تمهيدا لتصليحها .. بس بعده عقلي بقلي ما أصلح


وهيك .. هيني هون ..
كمان شو قايم أنقلع أنام ..

ما في أشي بس حبيت أشعبر عن نخاشيشي الجوانيه
تصبحون على خير .. زواري الاعزاء

The Dream

The words go away .., the languages, and letters .. just slip from my hands .. like drops of water .. those eyes of urs ...i fear them, they take me .. in reality and dreams .. away from me .. i can hear them breathing .. like a monster, in the depth of the seas .. waits impatiently to swallow my soul .. to suck the air out of my lungs .. those hands of urs.. they touch, and burns my skin like lava .. they sink deep in my flesh .. the feeling of them, leaves a permanent mark on my bones every time u passes them around me its the worst type of black magic .. yet the sweetest taste of all tastes .. a dream of angelic u .. whispers in my ears every day .. i still can feel the air, tickling them .. i still can feel alive every time the words dive in my ears .. reviving my brain again .. i can hold, i can stay here .. i can be strong, coz there is always the dream of u .. that lives with me ..

An "Ex" ...

Do you believe in luck?

Well, I - myself - don't know, sometimes, the idea of good luck, or bad luck seems so silly, sometimes, you can't give a reasonable explanation for what just happened, or what didn't just happen or why. Only the word (Luck), can give your wondering soul a bit to shut it up.

As always, my dear blog readers (who I think is gonna quit visiting this page soon enough) the posts under the (Crappy talk) category, fits with my bad, good fortune.

The other day, I was walking in the university, when out of sudden, a girl who was walking by, waved to me...
I looked into her face, and it was a shock, she was my first "Ex"!!
Its not like, I accidentally meet an "Ex" every other day, this was my first time, I thought (with my lack of experience in such things) I won't see her ever again. It was way too awkward. I haven't seen her in two years or so, we talked for a while, I asked about her news she did the same.
I’ve known few girls after her, and formed better relationships than the first one with this girl. The thing is that with her it was the first time for me to feel what real love is, in addition to that, the breaking up process with her was the second worst effecting one I had.

back to the "luck" thing, I have no idea that bad luck can go to this extent, after a recent break up i had, in the wrongest timing ever, which I’m still healing from, this incident just opened more old wounds, the ones that can't be ever healed (people with a failed-first-love can understand what I mean), wait! It gets more interesting, with all of this in my head, I just have less than 20 days to finish up my thesis or I’m screwed.

What bothers me most is that thinking about this incident, is taking more time than it should take, I have no idea how to get it out of my head. Have you?

On a side note:
3n jad thail el chaleb 3omroh ma ben3adel...
No matter what I do, thinking about people, places, actions, reactions, past, future, and much more things, takes more of my time and energy than actually doing something about it. The “over thinking less doing” is my main problem, I guess, its some kind of a genetic thing, a built-in overactive chip in my useless brain. In fact I starts to hate my brain the way I hate my heart, it gets me into more trouble than actually help in fixing them.

Thanks for listening guys, zay el 3adeh, I’m whining like a baby. Ed3ole balke hal mar7aleh 3addat 3ala 5air o ba66alat postate kollha whining.

Eco Still Got it!!

sfo is gonna kill me for this

two posts in one day ..


i couldn't resist,

its me again..

as crazy and immature as always ..

Dreaming about the hair I've never had ..


have a laugh everybody..


Eco Still got it .. Eco Still out of his mind

on a side note: many thanks for the photographer

Phrases

مرحباً
بَن
بَن
بَن
"هاظ الصدى بلا موأخذه"

الآن

مبارح وأنا مروح مع صاحبي
مرينا من عند واحد
كان يدحمس على كرشته
enno, we where like


المهم .. مسكنا شلّة للزلمة .. على
المدام عازيته .. اليوم
وحاس أنه اذا ما اتعشى اليوم رح يطلق حدا
ومن هالتحشيش الهبلي هاظ

ف صاحبي بحكي
لا يا سيدي .. الزلمة متعشي
بس

ان في البطن للخلوة .. لا يملؤها الا الحلوى

انه انا حششت على التركيبة
أول مرة بسمعها
وتخيلته .. قاعد بلفح هريسه والا هيطلية بعد عشا دسم
وبقلب على ظهره زي الصرصور بعدها



سؤال الحلقة بقول:
عندكو تركيبات معبرة زي هالتركيب؟
حشيشية التأثير؟
وحريقية النتائج؟


اذا عندكو شاركونا!!

quick news

سلام يا حلوين
العالم اللي بتابعو أخباري وبتطمنو علي دايما
شكرا جزيلا ألكو



مبارح رحت عملت فحوصات الدم
والوضع فيها كان طبيعي مية مية

فـــــ بالنتيجه تأكد موضوع الــ
Cluster Headache

والحمد لله
وبما إنو السبب المحرك بلش أهتمامي فيه يقل لحد ما وصل أدنى مستوياته
نوبات الصداع صارت أخف
وانشالله بتحسن مستمر
وعلى رأي المثل
Haich mi6'ba6ah bidha haich 5atem




على الصعيد الدراسي
الوضع بخزي

كثييييييييير بخزي

بدنا حدا يكتبلنا الرسالة
وبسعر مغري
مين الو مصلحة؟

Cluster headache

Wikipedia (full page article)
Cluster headache, nicknamed "suicide headache", is a neurological disease that involves, as its most prominent feature, an immense degree of pain. "Cluster" refers to the tendency of these headaches to occur periodically, with active periods interrupted by spontaneous remissions. The cause of the disease is currently unknown. It affects approximately 0.1% of the population, and men are more commonly affected than women.

in that high spirit, i begin..

today i visited the ENT (Ear, Nose & Throat) clinic in king Abdullah Hospital
surprisingly, the specialist didn't find anything interesting in my Sinus (جيوب) .. o san7ah nshallah ..

anyway, he proposed that i have a dislocation in my jaw joint ..
so i went to a jaw surgeon, a friend of my brother ..

well, no such dislocation was found, but they proposed what i mention in the title "Cluster headache". and they "as usual" related it to my "always angry = nervous" issue

there is some test need to be done to confirm, those would be on Saturday, if confirmed I'm screwed

i don't know, i guess its not important What the illness is, its to know it and trying to fix it ..


el 7amdo lillah ..


on a side note:
today i received my "only" birthday present .. thanx dear, u can't imagen how much it meant to me .. :)

Silence it is ..

now you know me very well
i am unpredictable even for myself. and that is very sad.

i need to silence my urges, and stop everything i am doing
angry, is not the word, neither frustration, its waking up, clear sight.

done! with all of this i'm done, with what comes, i haven't even begun...

silence, my friends, my dear nothingness, i've reached the point of silence.

STOP! then .........................

HBD

well,
i was thinking
isn't it ..

"Every breath I take .. is another nail in my Coffin"

sad .. but true


Happy [Breathing] Day
to me
:)

Back to Amman

or it should be “back to Friends”  or even “Back to Memories”

Hello everybody,

it was a delightful day, my last Thursday, it brought back lots of memories, happy ones as well as sad ones, as i was riding the bus toward Amman. I met my dear friends, Shafeeg, Samir, Sami, Muhannad, Abu Jarrar, 7abbas, Mo3ath, and “el3arees” Osama.

Oh Dear .. Oh Dear, I had loads of fun, laughed like crazy, the joy inside was indescribable, i miss that rush i used to have when i was looking to the running landscapes on the way from Irbid to Amman, and the sadness on my way back to Irbid.

the most hurtful part was passing by “JU” and not stepping down from the bus.

anyway, all details with pictures will be found in ReMad’s Report Thread in mahjoob.

just wanted to say, thank you my dearest friends, for the great time. o Allah ybarek lal 3arees o yhanneh.

Health Issues ..

looks like i’m getting weird with all that “inside” stuff i’m posting.

bs don’t judge .. its for the best in such condition of mine ..

yo6ell 3alaykom Eco el youm mn Al Yarmouk Hospital / bani kinana / Irbid ..

anyhow, to start from point zero of this story.. i had some headache issues few years ago ..

a migraine-like attacks around the eye, it was horrible .. some diagnosed it with something called “tensional-headache”

long story short, after few weeks of suffering, without any know good treatment, the pain went away, and i was good-to-go .. again ..

now, every once in a while, i had a rough day or two, this time it went very bad, the attacks were longer (~1:30 Hours) 2-3 times a day, and the pain was beyond imagination.

so i went to doctors again

guess what!! i had an X-ray ..and they said its “حساسيه بالجيوب الانفيه”, they gave me a nose spray, and some other medications, i’m not very optimistic about it, enshallah betkon heyyh ..

sooooooo, now i’m under medical influence, so don’t feel bad etha shallaf 3addad commentaty …

on a side note: i discovered some internal-ma9ayb-hobby ..

writing songs and singing them .. OMG! .. i laughed like “9ara9oor 3ala 6’ahroh” lamma smi3t 7ali ..

here is my latest piece ..

ياللي هواك ملوعني

يابو قلب زي السحاب

وسيع على قد السما

ناعم ومريح اكثر من الحرير

وابيض .. اكثر من البياض

وبيوسع كل الاحباب

enjoy

The better days are here :D

dear friends,

looks like the high spirit, has come finally.

el 7amdillah, i’m feeling much better, thanx to those dear friends i have, the cyber ones, as well as the fully existed ones ..

saleh, lioness, and sfo, ur advices were most appreciated ..

in fact, they have the main factor to change my point of view ..

el 7amdillah, i’m looking at the full half of the cup now …

and here is some of what i came up with ..

- to work at a time where noone is awake but me.

- some timetables and deadlines and skeletons to plan things out ..

- and most importantly, a one hour of net activity; msnger, blog, and other sites ..

thanx alot people, i hope to achieve what i aim to, wel koll elo 7ilwan enshallah.

PS: Saleh, here is your big font ..